Trysha's Page

Over the past week I've been picking up some old habits. I hadn't realized I had lost them, but they are back...with a vegence.




1. Starbucks- Wow. I didn't realize it had been so long since our last rendezvous. I've missed you, long lost lover. Nevermind that since our departure my caffiene tolerance had gone down, so meeting back up with you kept me up for hours. Several hours past my bedtime.


2. Project Runway- I practically peed my pants when you popped up on my Tivo. You came back like a long lost friend (who hadn't invited me to her wedding) looking for some companionship. Technically we are now only One Degree of Seperation away, since I was almost cart-sided in Target by last years contestant, so I feel close; connected. I know that there is a big elephant in the room between you and Bravo, but I big pink puffy heart you. Our reunion will be short, I cannot follow you to Lifetime: Television for Vaginas. Remember the good times.


3. Kevin James- I am a self-declared chubby chaser. Since meeting back up with Starbucks and the side effects of that, I was able to watch many Tivo'd episodes of King of Queens. Oh you. Your witty banter, your funny jokes. OMG you make me LOL IRL!



Now imagine an evening with all three. Oy to the vey! Sometimes life is too good.

I'm usually not a willy-nilly flip-flopper, but Kate Gosselin, I'm beginning to turn on you. I didn't think it could happen. I watch and I want more kids. Even my kids are convinced we need more kids. You put up with Mady's breakdowns, cook Organic meals; you even make your own play-doh! But really woman, do you have to speak to Jon that way?

Like I get that you have 8 kids and that will make you crazy-busy, but your ever-patient husband is there to help. And you talk down to him, constantly undermine him and feel it necessary to correct every word out of his mouth.


Don't think it's just me. Read here and here. I mean it's not all bad and at least you are keepin' it real. You work at your marriage, you work hard at your marriage. You work hard at raising eight kids. But sometimes you get a little self-righteous and a little on your high-horse.

I'm putting you on warning, Kate Gosselin. Keep it real. And be nicer to Jon...much nicer.

Oh thank God, we're halfway there! While I don't feel like I've been pregnant forEVER (Angelina Jolie, I'm eyeballing you, thanks for finally having your kids. Humanity and the tabloids thank you) I feel like I've known forever. I mean 14 weeks is a long time. My Aunts dog got knocked up and already had her puppies in that time. Bitch. We've been upgraded to Coconut Status this week:

I mean check this out:

Yeah, that's some major bumpage. It's only accentuated when I wear maternity tops...which happen to not be the most flattering fashions this season. Tents that my elephant belly can fit under. Fantastic.

Puke.

But not all baby-related fashion is horrendous. Case in point:

I know, right? I want to die from the cuteness...but good thing I didn't because then I would've missed this. A newborn sleeper with the worlds tiniest pocket. Don't believe me. Look.

Seriously, what fits in that pocket except for drool and spit? Tiniest pocket EVER!

And I could die from the cuteness but we're too busy nesting at Casa De La Toasted. All of us. Normally I would say it's just Caedon's nature and his OCD that makes him line up his shoes, but it wasn't. The entire room looked like this. Legos and crayons organized by color! BY COLOR PEOPLE!!! Shorts, shirts all folded/hung and put away. Sometimes my parenting skills make my mother proud.

After observing Caedon dusting and organizing and folding and steam cleaning and who knows what else in there, Brandon was motivated too. I mean, I thought I didn't know who EMT-Dad was anymore, but this, is almost too much for my pregnant hormones to handle.

EMT-Dad: Have you heard Weezers new song?

Me: No. I don't like Weezer anymore. Sell outs.

E: Well I like and I just downloaded it.

Me:Why would you do a thing like that for?

E: Because I like it.

Me: They sold out after they did The Green Album.

E: Which one?

Me: The one with Island in the Sun.

E: What song is that?

Me: "On an island in the sun We'll be playing and having fun And it makes me feel so fine I can't control my brain Hip hip"

E: Oh yeah, the video with the band and a bunch of monkeys.

Me: Yeah, that's the one.

E: Well I like Pork and Beans.

Me: I think it sucks. I'm old skool Weezer. They sold out with that whole Beverly Hills song crap.

E: Well I happen to like Pork and Beans and I liked Beverly Hills.

Me: I don't even know who you are anymore.

Internet...it's like I'm living with a stranger. The Blue Album is in constant rotation in my car and Surf Wax USA came on and EMT-Dad was all "who's this, I like it". I wanted to push him out of the car. I have so much work to do.

Oh Katy Perry, with your cute little side-swept bangs and little lyrics about cherry lipgloss. (Damn those catchy friggin' lyrics) You will never be the original girl kisser.
Rock on Jill Sobule.